Vila crept cautiously down the corridor, his back against the wall, ever alert to anything that might mean trouble. The two guards (he assumed they were guards) ahead of him turned and passed through a doorway, still arguing animatedly, as they had the whole time he had been following them. He slid quietly past the opening, catching a few snippets of conversation as he did so.
"According to canon..."
"Dont be so bloody stubborn, what I meant was..."
"Cant you two just give it a rest..."
"Who ate all the digestives?"
Seemed like everyone in the base was in there. Good. He reached the end of the corridor and found what he was looking for. Definitely someone in there, two people if the voices were anything to go by. He looked the lock over then pulled the appropriate tools from the box he carried. Dead simple. The door was unlocked in a matter in seconds and he pushed it slowly open, fully prepared to be jumped by one of the occupants.
Scanning the room, he spotted a slightly dishevelled Servalan reclining on a pile of velvet cushions. Running water could be heard from somewhere just beyond the room. Vila drew his gun.
"Vila, I wondered when youd be turning up. Isnt this pleasant?" Servalan smoothed her kimono over her thighs and gave him a predatory smile.
"Wheres Avon?" Vila asked suspiciously.
"Why, hes in the shower. What do you take me for?"
"An avaricious monomaniac, what else?"
"I didnt know you cared." Servalan stretched and patted the cushions next to her. "Why dont you come and sit down here?"
"Because I dont trust you?" Then again Avons ready in ten minutes usually took at least half an hour.
Keeping his gun aimed at Servalans heart (assuming she had one), he crossed the room and perched on the furthest part of the mountain of velvet and padding.
"Vila?" Vila was examining the variety of confectionery he had half-inched from the canteen on his way in. "How would you like your own planet?"
"Never really thought about it. Lot of responsibility. I mean its not like a cat where the neighboursll feed it if you decide to go away for the weekend. Can you imagine me asking Avon to keep an eye on my planet while I went on an interstellar cruise? Dont know what hed get up to with it."
"But surely, your own planet?"
"Nah, dont think so somehow." Vila unwrapped a large bar of chocolate-covered nougat and looked at it.
"Well, then," Servalan tried a different tack, "havent you ever wondered-"
"What itd be like to shag you? Ill ask Avon when we get back. And if he wont tell me straight away, Ill just threaten to tell Cally he still hasnt given up smoking."
"But wouldnt you rather find out for yourself?" Servalan slid across the cushions towards him; Vila did some rapid calculating as to which was the lesser evil out of resisting Servalan or giving in to her. She slid over him, bringing them nose to nose. He held out the nougat.
"You could have just asked."
"Thats not what I want, and you know it."
"Well if you insist..." Vila slid his free hand down between her thighs. Warmth, wetness, someone had certainly been having fun... He fiddled with the jewels on the various piercings he encountered, which seemed to go down well. Keeping an ear out for the sound of the shower, he continued to tease Servalan with his fingers and nibbled distractedly on the nougat.
Then the water stopped running.
"Okay, thats quite enough," said Vila sliding out from under Servalan and drawing his gun. "Looks like theres a fresh robe for you in that cupboard thing. Why dont you put it on and sit in that nice chair over there?" He leaned against the wall and waited for Avon to emerge from the shower room.
"So," said Vila as he and Avon returned their teleport bracelets to the rack. "Wheres the nearest pawn shop?"
"Oh, just picked these up." Via held out his hand to show off the four diamonds and three rubies that he had acquired.
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